Life Worth Living

Greetings true believers! We have pulled the ride over for a bathroom break. For those of you who come here for your weekly dose of anger and entertainment, prepare to be disappointed. Today I would like to discuss something that, in the past I have been warned not to. My wife.

With Valentine's Day upon us, I am surrounded by love. I am not only surrounded because of what is on the television and radio, but also in my life. For many who have known me forever, they will attest that my life (the first 20 years of it or so) was lived for me. This may sound like a normal thing, but let me explain further.

I was a very uncaring individual. This is part of where my emotional crippling stems. I had friends...I would like to think more than a fair share. I had girlfriends. I had acquaintances. The one person I cared about most though, was myself. I did many things in my early days that hurt a good many people. Whether it was physically or emotionally, it was still my actions that caused the pain. The major problem with this was, unlike your average individual, I didn't care. I got people in trouble for things that I did and my only reaction was relief that I was not punished for it. I was what can only be referred to as a petty thief. If I saw things that I wanted, I would take them. Did I care what the owner's of these possessions felt when they found their items missing? Nay. Did I care how hard they had to work to attain them? Again, I say nay. I was out for number one, and that is all that mattered. People in my life passed away during those first 20 years and I didn't shed a tear. Was it because I did not care that they had died? No, it was because I thought that showing emotion was a sign of weakness and number one was not weak. Yes, true believers, your humble narrator was an asshole.

What does any of this have to do with my lovely wife you may be asking? Well, she is the one that saved my life and made it worth living. My parents have told me in the past that Ryanne was the best thing that ever happened to me. I completely agree with them. Since being married (going on 16 years now) my life has changed drastically. She has shown me that there are things more important in this world than me. I have learned that showing emotion, in whatever form, is a show of strength vice weakness. It is a strong man that can cry at the birth of his child. To be able to look into his wife's eyes and smile just knowing that she is there for him. I am now 38 years old, married to the greatest woman alive, and the father of two wonderful boys. My wife is the anchor of my family. I wonder at times, where would I be if she hadn't come into my life. These are not happy places to go in my mind. Let me take you on a journey of my thoughts....

I am sure that I would not be married. I am sure that I would not have children. I am almost positive that I would be in jail somewhere. I would not have the friends that I do today because I would have alienated them in one shape or form. I would probably not be speaking to my father (who I have a great relationship with now). Those of you who grew up with me know that is no small thing, for he and I did not EVER see eye to eye. None of these situations are ones that I would want to be in, but am sure that I would have been had it not been for my loving wife.

As the days of my life turn into nights, I can think of no other person that I would like to spend them with. Those of you who have known me in the past and are still talking with me today should thank my wife for whatever I have become. I am what I am because of her, and do not know what I would ever do without her. So, on this day before St. Valentine's Day, I want to thank her for making my life worth living.

-Salty Dog