Monday, December 30, 2013

Breach of Contract

Welcome back, faithful followers. As many of you know, my blog is normally for me to have fun. I like to pick on the stupid things in life, point out ridiculous stories that I find, and complain about Netflix not carrying BJ and the Bear (that one I am serious about!). Today I am here with a legitimate bitch, even though it may be a selfish one. I know that I am not the only one out there who will be affected by this...hell, not even the only one of my friends.

My blog has never been political, or about politics at all. Today, we change that. When I joined the Navy in 1991, I was promised (in writing) a few things by the United States Government upon my completion of 20 years of service. Among those promises were a guarantee that I would receive 50% of my base pay per month, I would be able to retire at the age of 39, I would receive a blue ID card (and all benefits that the card includes), free medical coverage for all service connected injuries, and an annual cost of living allowance increase (COLA) name a few. There is currently a bill in Congress that is taking away the annual COLA for "non retirement age retirees". Now, when you read "non retirement age retirees", that may be confusing. When you do 20 years in the military, you are eligible to retire (from the military). "Retirement age" for the rest of the country is 62. So...being 42 and retired, makes me one of those non retirement age guys. What this means is, until I turn 62 years old I will not receive the COLA that the government guaranteed writing. This turns out to be about 120,000.00 that I lose over that 20 year period.  This doesn't seem right to me.

I was no desert warrior over my 20 year career. I was not haze grey and underway for 20 years straight. I did, however, go when/where I was told to go...stay on the ship while in port because we were fast cruising...give up my right knee to the Navy due to years of steel decks..miss my family for months on end. I did what I agreed to do when I signed the dotted line and raised my right hand. Now, the government is changing the rules, after I fulfilled my end of the deal. This is a giant crock of shit. So tell me, Congress...tell me where I failed to live up to my end. Was it that I didn't lose my family because of the time you kept me away? Was it that I didn't give you BOTH of my knees? Was it my complaints to Netflix about BJ and the Bear not being in their library? Where was it that I failed to uphold my end of the contract? So if I, a lowly Deck Ape, can do what I promise...why is it that you, the United States Government, can't do the same?

What this boils down to, is a simple Breach of Contract. What course of action do we have? If we didn't hold up our end of the deal..the Gov't would take action. We, the People....can take no such action. I know that this will fall on deaf ears, but I needed to get it out of my head. Thanks for taking the time to read. Any help or info on where to go next is welcome. Until next time...Stay Salty.

-Salty Dog

Monday, October 21, 2013

Welcome to 1981

Hello good people! It has been four months since I sat down and had anything to write about. Last month I ran into a man named EXZAYVIER, and I almost had to write about it....but I passed. But this time, I went all Popeye, and I can'ts stands no more! So what is it that brings me here today? Is it to tell you about the new, hot podcast "Attack of the Fangirls" (check them on Facebook and iTunes)? Is it to answer the age old question, "who wrote the book of love"? Is it to organize a hostile takeover of Netflix so that they will finally show BJ and the Bear? Sadly...nay nay. What brings me to all of you on this crappy Monday is my nemesis PDDFL. For those of you not following along, that would be Puff Diddy Daddy Farty Licky (Sean Combs to some of you).

Those of us who remember the early 1980s, you may remember a little network that played music videos 24/7. It was oddly named MTV...Music TeleVision. MTV picked up the idea of Friday Night Videos and ran it all the time. People loved and wanted their MTV. MTV was FM radio for your eyes. You would hear a song on the radio, and rush to MTV to see if there was a video for the song yet. Today, MTV is full of "reality" programing and very few music videos...or music anything. Did MTV move away from music videos because America doesn't want to watch that anymore? Is it because YouTube makes music videos available on demand? Is it because there is no good music out there today, anyway? Well, none of these questions matter, because starting tonight....PDDFL is bringing you  Revolt TV.

PDDFL is starting his own television network, like he's Oprah or something. Revolt TV is going to be a 24 hour music video channel. 30 years later, PDDFL decides to remake MTV. Piss Dookie is trying to bring the YouTube audience back to television. I would be the first one to say that this is going to fail miserably....but I also said that his attempt to rap would fail miserably. He found a way to use the death of Biggie Smalls to carry him long enough to make a record of his own, so who knows what he's going to do with Revolt. The first 24 hours will be Bad Boy videos? All Biggie, all the time? The resurgence of Mase? Ooooh, one can only hope.

Does the world need an MTV reboot? Will those of you in the Time Warner Cable area be tuning in? Should someone stop Piss Dookie from destroying our childhood memories? Check out his teaser here RevoltTV. I know that I am anti-PDDFL, but if any of you see this as a good idea, please let me know. Okay kids, off to get some work done. Hopefully next time we meet won't be four months from now. Until next time....Stay Salty.

- Salty Dog

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Can't Stands No More

Greetings from the abyss! I have returned. I know it has been awhile since I put fingers to keys, but I'm getting fed up. And when I get fed up, I need to purge...What is it that could pull me away from enjoying my backyard oasis, just to come here? Is it that the new Yeezy album is on the streets today? Nay to the Nay. Is it to tell you to go over to and listen to a great podcast? (maybe...but not my primary goal). Is it to, once again, beg you all to join me in a march on Netflix so that they will bring us BJ and the Bear? YES!....but nay nay for the time being. What brings me here today is the treatment of the Flag.

If, for some freak reason, you don't know...I did 20 years in the United States Navy. I started my career on February 19, 1991. For those that may not remember, this was the beginning of Operation Desert Shield. Did I join the Navy for college money? Did I join the Navy for the travel? Did I join the Navy to get away from Hyde Park? Nay nay....I joined the Navy because I was a Patriot, and I felt it was my duty to protect this country, its flag, and what it stands for. I have since retired from the Navy, but I am still a Patriot, and am here today because assholes in our own country are desecrating the Flag.

Last week, HGTV decided that they would send out their recommendations for Summer party decorations. That's cool, HGTV is that type of company. They tell you how to hang red, white, and blue banners around your yard. They tell you how to use Cool Whip, strawberries, and blueberries to make a festive 4th of July dessert. They tell you to use an American Flag as a tablecloth. Wait, what? HGTV actually told Americans to "Drape a large American Flag over the table as a bright and festive table runner." "Use a nylon flag, so spills can easily be wiped off and the flag can later be hung with pride on a flag pole." WHAT? Are you kidding me? Feel free to spill your food and drink all over the symbol of our country. Then wipe it off and run it up the pole and honor it? Don't they make "flag themed" table runners? Should we wipe our mouths on the flag too? Nay, they make flag themed napkins. Why in the world would you suggest using an actual flag for these purposes? HGTV has since apologized for this suggestion, but only because they were under heavy fire from the people of America.

Yesterday, Lil' Wayne made world wide news. Was it because he is such an incredible artist? Was it because he got a new tattoo? Was it because he claimed to have sex with a woman with a  baseball bat? Nay is because he has a new video on the street where he walks on the American Flag. If you want to see this mess, just Google Lil' Wayne American Flag, I am not showing it here.  The song is titled "God Bless Amerika" and contains the lyrics: “My country ‘tis of thee/ sweet land of kill ‘em all and let ‘em die/ God bless Amerika/ This so godless Amerika … the stars on the flag are never shining.” First off, it doesn't even rhyme!! His assault on hip hop disgusts me almost as his assault on the country that my shipmates and I vowed to defend. He has since attempted to apologize by saying that his stepping on the flag was an accident. He says that the flag was supposed to fall to the ground behind him, but he was not scripted to step on it. This brings a few things to mind; why not edit that part out of your video if it was an "accident"? Why would you think it was okay to let the Flag fall to the ground in the first place? Why in the blue hell do you want to continue living here if you feel this way about our country? Why didn't you apologize for writing and performing shitty music? 

All Lil' Wayne talks about it being knee deep, waist deep, neck deep in his women. Hey Wayne... you can have all of those sounds like you can drive a truck through them. You can even continue making awful music for the youth of today who don't know what real hip hop is. What you cannot do in this country, is desecrate the Flag. You, sir, are a giant trough of douche. You not only disrespected the symbol of this country, but all the men and women who fought and died in order to protect it. I would protest your music and no longer listen to you...but I don't listen to you anyway. In closing...Fuck HGTV  and Fuck Wayne. Until next time...Stay Salty.

-Salty Dog