Pluto...We Hardly Knew Ya

Welcome back true believers. As our ride takes us on a journey not only of sight and sound, but of mind. We are not following Rod Serling into the Twilight Zone, but we are going to reach for the Outer Limits.

As we all remember growing up, we had nine planets. For those that don't remember... Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto. Pluto was discovered and designated as our ninth planet in 1930. 75 years later, a group of overly intelligent men and women got together and decided to change the definition of the word "Planet". It is a sad day in America when a GROUP of people have nothing better to do than change the definition of the word planet. I could see one lonely smart guy with nothing to do on a Friday night except watch reruns of Nova, but a group of people that had nothing else going on so they needed to change the meaning of words. And how smart do you have to be before someone takes you seriously enough to accept the fact that you changed the definition of a word? I could decide to change the meaning of the word "Midget" to mean "anyone under the height of 5'8" tall". Wouldn't the Wizard of Oz remake look a little different then? Nay nay, because no one would accept the fact that just because I said the definition changed, that it actually changed.

So, you are a fly on the wall in the big white room when these brainiacs are deciding what makes a planet...well, a planet. Big brain guy number one says, "Mars... you're big, you're red, you're rockin it pretty hard...good job, you get to stay a planet." "Venus, you look kinda like us, so you have to stay or we have to go with you...you get to stick around." "Saturn...like what you do with the rings. Keep on, keepin on." "Uranus....stop laughing and grow up. It isn't funny anymore. We get it...Your Anus...ha ha. If you can mature a little, you can stay." "Pluto...anyone seen Pluto? Oh, there you are in the back...as usual. You know what Pluto? This just isn't working out. Turn in your keys and leave the solar system. No no...just go, let's not make this awkward."

Who in the blue hell do these people think they are that they can just fire a planet? That is some ego. Do they realize that Pluto was named after the Roman god of the underworld? This is not the guy that you want to piss off. Yeah, yeah, he is also Mickey Mouse's big, happy dog..I know. Do you want to be the one to wonder which one is going to come after you? Big wet kisses from a dog or hellfire and brimstone from the depths of Hades...hmmm.

Anyway....Planets (whatever that means these days) we need 9, not 8 and a dwarf. If you grew up with nine planets, let me hear you loud and proud, "Every child of mine, will know that the planets total nine!" Until next time true believers...Stay Salty!

-Salty Dog

Entrance Theme

Welcome back everyone. Let us get back on track. As I was sitting at work with my Chief, we were discussing (for no apparent reason) entrance themes. You know what they are, those songs that are played when your favorite boxer, wrestler, or Ultimate Fighter makes his way to the ring. This could be anything from Metallica to Toby Keith, to Jay-Z. This brought up the discussion of what would YOUR entrance theme be if you were one of these guys?

How does one make a decision like that? There are so many great songs out there, and from so many different genres. Does it depend on your fighting style? Does it depend on your character's motivation? How would you choose? Do you take something current or something classic? Something obscure that will only be associated with you? I have been thinking about this for hours now and am not sure that I even have an answer yet.

I would think that I would select something hardcore. Something that would put fear into my opponent right off the bat. Die Motherfucker Die by Dope, or Bring Out Your Dead by Strung Out (if you don't know either song, please investigate and enjoy...you're welcome). The other side of my brain says that I should stick with my roots and go with an old school hip hop song. Something like King of Rock by Run DMC or Chief Rocka by Lords of the Underground. I would have to pick a song that I loved because it is the only song that I get to hear before a fight. The song will quickly become associated with me, so I couldn't just change it whenever I got tired of it.

I know that this is a short and off the wall topic, but I needed to get it out there. So true believers...what would YOUR entrance theme be? And better yet...why that song? Until next time...Stay Salty