Ouch!

Welcome aboard true believers! Some of you have been wondering where my B-Log and I have been. I have responded to a couple people by saying that nothing has irritated me, upset me, made me laugh, made me cry, or otherwise inspired me to write. I believe I have found a topic that speaks to all of us, and needs to be spoken about!

Many of you, if not all of you, know that I have had multiple surgeries on my right knee. The first time that it was injured was because I was being a nice guy. Helping a little old lady change her tire....but that is another story. The thing is, it was a legitimate injury... a car fell on my knee. My leg is not the most stable these days, but again..not the point. I was walking down my steps last week...or the week before... I don't know, my short term memory is shot. Ask me about something that happened 20 years ago and I remember like it was yesterday. Ask me about yesterday and it may as well has been 20 years ago. ANYWAY...I was walking down my steps (all three of them) and all of a sudden..POP! My leg buckles underneath me. That is not the worst part about it...the feeling of my thigh bone sliding forward, grinding across my shin bone, and ripping my anterior cruciate ligament in the process...hence the POP!

Is this a blog about me and my woes? Nay nay. This is about us getting old and getting injuries for no good reason. Walking down three steps should not tear ligaments in your knee. Phantom bruises...I know there are some of you out there that look down at a bruise on your arm or leg and wonder, "how the hell did that get there?" Have you ever woken up from a long night's sleep and had muscles in your arms and shoulder hurt like you just bowled in a 100 game tournament? You wonder to yourself, "when did I go bowling?" as you rub your shoulder. These are things that happen as we get older.

Remember when we were younger and we could stay up all night drinking, get 45 minutes of sleep and then go operate heavy machinery? No problems! We could pull out a knife and stab ourselves 17 times...and just sit there and watch it heal! These days are gone for us. Now we worry about sleeping wrong ( a term I have never understood). This causes us to buy Craftmatic adjustable beds. There is probably a newer trend in bedding, but as I said..no short term memory. 20 years ago? I gotcha! I wake up, go to work, coach baseball, and come home. I am not an extreme sports guy, I don't run....well I will leave it there, I don't run. Well, not unless someone is chasing me and I know that I can't take them....anyway. What is it with us that around age 28 our bodies start to die on us? Phantom bruising, sore muscles for no reason at all, loss of memory. I should not roll out of bed in the morning and immediately say "Ouch!".

There was no ranting necessary on this entry, just a sharing of pain. Who's with me people? It is time to revolt against our bodies! I think it is all of this "healthy living" style stuff that is killing us. No more organic anything. No more fad diets. No more gym memberships. I say that the only way to defeat this is to eat Fruity Pebbles or Cap'n Crunch for breakfast, Fluff for lunch, and pizza for dinner. All meals should be accompanied by some sort of carbonated malt beverage. Let's eat like we did when we were indestructible and see if that is the problem. Until next time, my friends..stay Salty!

-Salty Dog