You'll Poke Your Eye Out Kid!

Of all the things that have been said about me...safety conscious has never been one of them. But today, the Salty One brings you a bit of a public service announcement. Don't run with scissors, don't play with fire, don't stick things up your nose, and don't pour flamable liquids into your eyeball. Wait, you have never heard that last one? Your mom never taught you that growing up? Well that is because it is commone sense for the general public. But some people's kids.....

Let me introduce you to the latest fad amongst stupid kids...Vodka Eyeballing. Is this as simple and stupid as it sounds? Yes. These kids are sitting around drinking vodka...and they decide "hey, how about I put that bottle opening up to my eyeball and dump it in?" Does this help in getting drunk quicker? Nay nay. This just burns the cornea for the sake of stupidity (see earlier blog on stupidity). So not only are these people stupid, now they are intentionally going blind for the sake of a laugh! This is going to lead to your tax dollars paying for their disability. Not to mention that it is a complete waste of good vodka!

When we were young, we did some stupid stuff. We drank Cisco, and that in itself was such a grave mistake that it was taken off the market! Along with that pain, we drank St. Ides which was a "high gravity" malt liquor. Exactly what that means, I will never know. Why will I never know...they took THAT off the market too. What can we do to stop the new crop of idiots and their eyeball nuking? You can't take vodka off the market, you can't flog them for being stupid...guess Darwin will have to step in and regulate the gene pool. Just like the kids that are into Jenkem. Jenkem is such a vile act, that I will not describe it, just click on the link.

I know this was short, but I couldn't let this stupidity go unaddressed. Next time will be more fun, I promise. Take this PSA as you will. Until next time..Stay Salty.

-Salty Dog